I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
