he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
It's shark week go big or go home
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
