So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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