Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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