the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize