So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
