I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
