Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Randomize
