Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
