so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize