I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
