that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize