we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
