Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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