I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
