I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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