What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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