jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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