you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
