belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
My sheets look like a crime scene.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
