I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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