i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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