Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
