the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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