no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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