I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
