we made out on top of his cat.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
