so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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