the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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