guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
