marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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