I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
