no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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