what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I could fuck to npr.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize
