real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
