South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
