You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Randomize
