threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
