broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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