You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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