We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
