I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
