I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
