yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
