just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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