I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
