So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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