I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
he puts the penis in happiness.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
