Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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