i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
