I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i think i have two assholes
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
